Rolly Burrell said they employ dirty tricks. Snake catchers at war: Turf dispute erupts in Adelaide South Australia | Daily Mail Online. The next week, the guy picks her up for their evening out dressed in a biker's black leathers. "Little Johnny: "That's not fair you answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one! Thats it! Johnny said, well, he likes to cut people in half. , Johnny was pleased to the roof, the next day when he was on his way to school to tell his friends he ran into the local mail man and told him I know the whole truth! Is he able to see alright?". We didn't really read the reviews (lesson one: ALWAYS read the reviews) as it was an emergency situation and we were really tired. "The next on the list was Little Johnny, a smart guy sitting in the back of the room. Top 40 What's the Difference Between Jokes. Little Johnny must be a prodigy with measuring distances. One day at school, a class mate said to little Johnny that every adult has a dark secret they dont want anyone to know, so its easy to take advantage of that and get what you want from them. The father sighs and says: "You know, you could do better.". The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother." And now tell us all how it is spelled. Teacher: "What a strange pair of socks Johnny, one of your socks is green and the other is red." Johnny: "Yes, it is very strange. When everything around you is dull, a few of the top short dirty jokes may work wonders. During her struggle, the phone rang so she asked four-year-old Johnny to answer the phone. "Johnny, I've been a teacher for eighteen years. Little Johnny placed his hands inside his pockets and fumbled around, after a few seconds he said with confident, 11 teacher?! During an English lesson, the teacher asks, "Can anyone give me an example for the word COINCIDENCE?Little Johnny volunteers, "Sir, my mum and dad were married on the same day.". - Sourced from reddit, twitter, and beyond! Teacher: You dont know your arithmetic. That made me chuckle out loud Dang A month? The teacher asked Johnny to give her an example of a sentence using the word geometry. "Teacher: "Now, Johnny, who discovered America? Doctor: You're obese. Little Johnny opened his hand and counted 1,2,3,4 and said - 4 teacher? Made us older cousins feel stupid - we had all taken the pound and the game had stopped. ", Teacher: "Great news, we have a test today, come rain or shine. The firefighter giving the presentation held up a smoke detector and asked the class: "Does anyone know what this is? Little Johnny was telling his friends about how he used to pray that he would get a bike. cried Little Johnny. "Teacher: "Yes Jenny. Miss Martin said sternly to the little boy while holding out her hand. Ready to laugh at how naive and hilarious Little Johnny jokes can get? By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. Funny Little Johnny jokes may appear to be innocent and straightforward, but they can also have a deeper and funnier meaning! - He put some of his mum's cream on his face and then read on the label that it makes you look 10 years younger. Ones blue, but the other is green.Little Johnny: Im not sure. Son: "Thanks Dad!". His sister tells him to give it back, she wants to keep it as a souvenir. A third grade teacher always took role call each morning and had the pupils' answer by reciting a short poem. I Went On Vacation With My Friend And Her Family, They Kicked Me Out So I Got My Own Room And Stayed On, 50 Times People Had A Beautiful Tattoo Idea And It Got Executed Perfectly, Storage Company Charges Client For Something That Never Existed, So She Pretends Like It Does And Now They Have To Find It, "Can't Approve Overtime? Teacher: "How far have you gone with your homework Johnny? His dad says to the teacher "Hang on a minute, I had Johnny at home with me for 2 months and I never phoned you once when he misbehaved. No truer words have been said, Little Man! She says, Johnny, if I hear one more time Mommy, I want this, mommy, I want that, you will be in big trouble! ", Teacher: "Now class, stop acting silly and start behaving, god is everywhere you know.". Full name: John 2. "Little Johnny: "We're not passing notes. Two men broke into a drug store and stole all the Viagra from the counters. ", Teacher: "If I lay one egg here and another there, how many eggs will there be? Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. lol seems like he should. ", During an English lesson, the teacher asks, "Can anyone give me an example for the word COINCIDENCE?. ""Yes, miss. Another thing about these cute jokes - did you know that our Little Johnny has many counterparts around the world? "Santa wrote back: "Send me your mother ". A pastor was chatting with some children about 'being good' and going to Heaven. Daisy: Why do you have two different colored socks on? Johnny said, well, he likes to cut people in half. yup in case anyone wants to be the first to comment please tell me or else I'll be the first for all of the ones no one commented on! He says out loud, one plus six, that son of a bitch is seven. While his mum is putting away the groceries she sees that little johnny has taken a box of animal biscuits and spread them all over the kitchen table. Oh my-I love this quote so freaking much! Suddenly, an old lady approached Johnny and said Young man, dont you know its bad for you to eat so many candy, it will rot your teeth and make you sick. "From Heaven," replied his mom. There latest trick is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime. "Now, what lesson can we derive from this experiment?" ", Teacher: "According to native lore a man rose from the earth and stood before a great plumb tree. Hello??!! Johnny: "The tiny seed grew and grew until it was finally big enough to say, 'Gee, I'm a tree! "Little Johnny replies "You simply sit on your recorder sir". "Little Johnny: "None! Teacher: You know you cant sleep in my class. Johnny: I know miss. It's weird. Little Johnny was in church when the wine and wafers were passed out. Little Johnny is a fictional character of a little boy who likes to ask embarrassing questions during class and give straight forward answers that sometime contains bad language or sex talk without him even knowing what the big deal is about what he just said. Send to your friends and see if they can make it through this t. Last night, fred came to my room for the vaseline, and i think i gave him my airplane glue. "My Mother is better than your Mother!" ", "No, son. Welcome to my page the official page of jeremy littel. Quick Lesson. ", Little Johnny: "I'm not going back to school ever again! 'Dead!' Please check link and try again. ", Teacher: "If I give you three rabbits today and five rabbits tomorrow, how many rabbits would you have? He asks her if she had a good time. "Teacher: "How come? Thats right everyone said the teacher. "Well, I can see why they threw her out! "an apple" replied little Raymond "no," said the teacher " it's a tomato but it shows your thinking." "I've now got something round, a greenish . "Does anyone know how to put 2 holes into one hole? ", During a lesson, little Johnny yawns extremely wide.The teacher tries to make a joke: Johnny, dont swallow me.He replies: Dont worry, teacher, I dont eat pork., I like the one more with. Billy said. He goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says, "I know the whole truth." She starts to talk sternly to Little Johnny and says "Johnny when I was a young girl I was told that if I made ugly faces and the wind changed, my face would stay that way. What did his mother do? . ", The teacher asked, How far have you gotten with your homework, Johnny?Little Johnny replied, About 8 kilometers, maam. Or maybe not so innocent, but just seems like it. During a lesson, little Johnny yawns extremely wide. ", "Johnny, where's your homework?" And why is that?Little Johnny offers, Miss, its so we wouldnt wake all those people sleeping., Little Johnny once bought his Granny a very fine toilet brush for her birthday. He stood and said, "My name is Dan, and when I become a man, I would like to go to Japan if I can, and I think I can. The teacher asked Little Johnny: "How can you prove the earth is round? 10. Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here. ", Mom: "Have you ever heard of the Socratic method? Little johnny said that his father is a magician. "A few minutes later she starts rubbing the cream off with a tissue. , Teacher: I hope I didnt see you looking at Tommys test paper. Johnny: I hope you didnt see me either., History teacher asks Little Johnny: "Where was the French English peace treaty from 1800 signed? "I said, "Tampons!? What's 6 inches long, 2 inches broad, and drives ladies insane? The teacher asked what his favorite magic trick is. the teacher asked.Little Johnny, who naturally sits in the back, raised his hand and wisely responded, "Drink whiskey and you won't get worms! asks the mother. Annoyed, Little Johnny asked his mom where they had got her from. Teacher: "Can you tell me something important that didn't exist 100 years ago? "My dog ate it," was his solemn response. Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly. The class answered with a roaring a cat! Me?, Little Johnny was sitting on the pavement stuffing all of his Halloween candy into his mouth. Ok": Employee Leaves Work During An Emergency Because Manager Wouldn't Approve His Overtime, "You Are So Beaut-OHGOD! Saying sorry or aplogising is not always an easy thing. Teacher: "Name an animal that lives in Lapland? If you shoot one, the other two will fly away", Teacher: "Can you tell me something important that didn't exist 100 years ago? ", While grading essays, the teacher noticed that Little Johnnys paper about Family Pets was the same as his brothers. Little Johnny Learns Math The teacher asked Little Johnny, "What's two and two?" He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said, "Four, teacher?" She said, "Yes, that's right, but you counted on your fingers. Do you really expect me to believe that? Cant argue with him there. Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. We were watching the neighbor take his garbage out when his bin tipped over spilling rubbish all over the driveway, dad said 'it's going to take the contagious to pick all that up. Little Johnny responds: "ten.". "Little Johnny, "Dear God. Little johnny said that his father is a magician. And why is that?, Little Johnny once bought his Granny a very fine toilet brush for her birthday. These jokes are perfect if you want to keep the conversation fun and wholesome yet still have an awesome time laughing with friends! Little Johnny said, Easy. Give it to me!" she yelled. 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